Well I am not an elegant writer, have had to make some hard choices in my life and have seen alot.I am 40 by the way EEjit, my advise and sounds like you would like it is to go to spain.First you like bar tending, second you have a plan sounds like if you go abroad.I say go to SPAIN buy you a bar and invite me over.Look bro you know in your heart what your capable of, push yourself as hard as you can and what will be will be.