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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
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    2,084

    Default Funny Religious Joke for all you guys. ENjoy!

    A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer.

    Suddenly, the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish."

    The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want."

    The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me."

    The man thought about it for a long time.

    Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."

    The Lord replied, "You want two or four lanes on that bridge?"

    I lmfao'd.

    It was totally amazing.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    2,084

    Default

    Omg!

    This one is funny.

    A changing room





    An Amish boy and his father are in a shopping mall for the first time when they come across an elevator.

    "What is this, Father?" asks the son.

    "I have no idea," replies the father. "I've never seen one before."

    The boy and his dad watch an old lady in a wheelchair roll into the elevator.

    The doors close.

    One minute later the doors open and out steps a hot young coed.

    The father looks at his son and says, "Go get your mother."

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    in a shoe
    Posts
    2,482

    Default

    It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No" says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?" The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley Cup we haven't been to together since we got married." "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. That's terrible... But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The man shakes his head. "No,” he says. “They're all at the funeral

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    2,084

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by targetguy1 View Post
    It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No" says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?" The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley Cup we haven't been to together since we got married." "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. That's terrible... But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The man shakes his head. "No,” he says. “They're all at the funeral
    I know some men who would not miss big sporting events, like the superbowl if their wife had passed away.

    It's hilarious because it can be so true in some cases.

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