more redneck jokes

[BADBEATCHAMP]

Why did the redneck put fireman's hats on the 3 wise men in his nativity scene?

Because the preacher said they came from afar.

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Emma Sue died during the night, and her husband Buddy called 911.

The 911 operator told Buddy that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator.

Buddy replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive."

The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?"

There was a long pause and finally Buddy said, "How 'bout if I just drag her over to Oak Street."


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Two rednecks are drunk as skunks and are driving down the highway, when the passenger says "Hey be careful, they just said on the radio that there's somebody driving the wrong way down highway 23 at exit 50 and the police haven't got 'em yet. That's right about where we are."

The driver belched loudly, then replied "It's a hell of a lot worse that they're lettin' on. Look! There's at least a hundred cars drivin' the wrong way on this highway.

[BADBEATCHAMP]

this ones a little dirty lol

Farmers Market
One day a redneck farmer goes to farmers market and asks "Do you have any donkeys"

"Yes, but we call them asses" the man replies.

"Ok, I'll take one" says the farmer "also I need a rooster, have you got any"

"No" replies the man "but we do have some ****rells. Will that do."

"Sure" says the man "Gimme one of those also"

When he arrived home he found that both his new animals were being quite troublesome.

He called his wife and said "You bend down and grab my ****, while I slap my ***"