BC

[BnLM5]

Oh yeah!!! BAP on the mind alright!!!.. Thanks for everything! My mind just went blank tonight. My husband asked what BAP stands for and I couldn't even tell him anything except we pool our money together. What does BAP stand for so I can answer him? My neice still lives with us and starts school on Monday. We have to go to open house on Friday so I can tell her teacher to keep her away from all sick kids. This is the wrong time in my life to have a kid! The germ and flu thing is scaring me to death. Chemo kills your immune system. Oh well, she is better here than in a foster home. I just wish the legal system would move a little faster so she can go back home and I can concentrate on me. Life happens, deal with it! Cancer Sucks!!! I feel great this week! Thank God!!!

You are gonna be fine. Just a few things to keep in mind. You and every one at or in your house wash your hands with soap and lots of water frequently. (use lotion). Pathogens (bacteria or virus) has to enter your body before you will get sick. They do this in many ways...like chapped or cracks in your skin, or if it is air borne breathing germs from a sneeze or cough etc. Try to avoid touching money! (Only God knows who has touched it or where they have been) Avoid putting your hands in your mouth or on your face as much as possible. When doing things in public be aware of things like pushing shopping carts they are filthy like money. sign things with your own pen don't put it in your mouth. Just be aware of anything you touch. Keep your hands free of cracks or soars even your cuticles. And wash hands frequently. And of course avoid people with the flu or cold or sickness as any of us would normally. And you should be fine. Oh and don't pick your nose. LOL Just kidding but really. I am glad to hear you are feeling well, that is great. And good idea about the conference. Most importantly make sure your niece knows how important it is that she be as germ free as you are. Wash, wash, wash!

[Pokerkitty6]

Hi all! I did something today I've never done before. I shaved my head! My hair was falling out so bad, I had no choice. It's freaky. My neice brought me the dust pan and saw me tearing up and said it's ok, you're still a beautiful woman. I told her she was sweet. I also told her I was crying because I was having a funeral for my hair. So we said "goodbye hair" together. It was a moment, I'm sure neither one of us will ever forget. My husband is going to freak out when he gets home tonight and sees I have no hair. Marissa and I went to Publix and people were staring at me. I had a doo-rag on and they still stared. It was quite comical actually. I told her next time we go out I might go bald and we'll really have some fun. It was weird, I grabbed my purse to get my keys and found my hair brush. I guess I won't need that for a while so I put it up, more room in my purse. Having no hair does kinda make you feel free. I took a shower and thought, gee this is what it feels like to be a guy, I can be ready in 5 minutes. I put up my hair dryer and my hair straightner. I have a wig, but it feels weird. I don't think I will like wigs. It's going to be hard having no hair. I'll have to go around like this for at least 8 months. Thats a long time for a woman to have no hair. There are certin parts of me I love with no hair. I tell ya I've never been that smooth before, so I guess ya gotta take the good with bad. Maybe that's how I'll distract Tony from looking at my head. I start to get boobs and I go bald. Cancer sucks!

[BnLM5]

PokerKitty today as I read what you had to say about shaving your hair off I found my self confused by several emotions. I cried for you. It was really weird. Now I feel a calmness around me that I can't explain. First I was lost like I wanted to think of what I could say for you to feel better. But I couldn't think. Then your niece, wow she is learning about some important things in life right now and she doesn't even realize it. You are playing a very big role in her life at this time. I admire you so much for that. And Tony the love you have for him is obvious and he will think you are sexy I would bet on it! Then I cried for myself I think. As I yearn for love like that. When someone really loves you, they love you for who you are, and who you are is that what comes from within. The outer beauty is overlooked by true love. Then I smiled as I see the positive attitude in you with Marissa. While you try to overcome your insecurities about the world around you and what they think about the way you look. I know you don't want to hear this right now but it's true nonetheless so I will say it..... You having no hair is a much bigger deal to you because you are living in the sudden experience. So I am sure as many people/in public were not looking at you for the reason of your hair as it is not new to them like it is to you. You can make it fun, as fun is always good, but remember it is okay to be scared too and it's okay for Marissa to know that. I said a prayer for you both today. As for me I pray that God will give me the peace that passes understanding for what is. Because come what has or will is always hard to understand. I can see the calmness I am feeling now is that peace that passes understanding that I pray for. Keep your chin up and stay strong were gonna beat it. We have some cancer a$$ kicking to do. We are getting there. Losing your hair is knowing that you are one step closer to victory. Lots of Love to you PK from me. Lori

[Pokerkitty6]

Wow Lori! You bring out some wild emotions in me. You are truly a good person, this I know, you can't fake something like that. I appreciate you helping me be strong. On a happier note, I forgot to tell you Marissa made me a special breakfast this morning...first time she ever made scrabled eggs, coffee with a banana wedge, and lemon drop candy with a prune on the side. She did cheer me up and the eggs were good too!!!

[freeringo]

Bald women are a huge turn on!!!!!!!!!

[BnLM5]

Wow Lori! You bring out some wild emotions in me. You are truly a good person, this I know, you can't fake something like that. I appreciate you helping me be strong. On a happier note, I forgot to tell you Marissa made me a special breakfast this morning...first time she ever made scrabled eggs, coffee with a banana wedge, and lemon drop candy with a prune on the side. She did cheer me up and the eggs were good too!!!

Thank you! What a sweetheart your niece is! (very thoughtful) She is learning a love that is never forgot! She is a very lucky girl and I really believe she is in a good place right now! Well needed by both of you prob. Why do all the good things in life have to be so hard? Or so it seems. Maybe because it is so human to be more aware of the difficult times as we all too often take advantage of the easy times and our subconscious is not even aware. So there for we feel the hard time more. I don't really know the answer as that was just my thought on it. Keep smiling it is so important! I am stressing this to you. Keep your love close and your head up. Your are well on your way to getting a grip on it now. So keep it up and you will conquer it Kitty!

[eejit101]

Wow, i missed 150 posts in here.

Ill read it one day.

I do not look like frnakie goes to hollywood.

And lv ya PK

[taylovesthebeatles]

Pokerkitty, thanks again as always for the update. I pray for you and your family constantly, and think of you often- I feel so incredibly blessed to call you a sister and a friend.

I'm proud of you for having the courage to shave your head. Although the reasons are not nearly as traumatic as your own, I can definitely sympathize with the feeling of loss and disconnection from not being able to use and participate in the same things that others take for granted on a daily basis. On the other hand, it can make life so much easier sometimes! For me, I can avoid entire sections of stores simply because I can't wear certain items or styles of clothing, like shorts or pants. Think of how much time and money that saves! I don't want to sound like I'm trying to patronize you or anything like that, but hopefully the wigs will get more comfortable for you and you'll get to do all sorts of things you couldn't do as easily before, and it'll be fun!

I wish you all the best, and I can't wait for the next update on how you are doing. Love you, girl.