BC

[Pokerkitty6]

Hi all!!! A few nights ago I told a few of you that I had something to say and I would tell you when I am ready. Well tonight I feel ready to share. I have grade 3 invasive poorly diferentiated ductal type mammory carcenoma. In other words, I have breast cancer. It's freaking me out. Within the next two weeks I will be having a radical double masectomy. Some of my words may be spelled wrong, but you get the idea. It sucks because I have beautiful 36C tits. I mean they are f'in nice. I will undergo reconstruction at the same time and I think I am going to get me some bigger tits. What do ya'll think about 36D? My husband smiles everytime I say it!!!! When I am down and out, my hubby, Tony has been instructed by me to play some of my games. Feel free to ask is that you Tony or Renee? We will be honest with you. My doctors says I should be back to playing golf 6-12 months down the road. I'll just have to learn how to regrip with bigger tits. I probably have to grip the shaft and squeze my tits together. All humor aside, this is very serious for me. I thought I would just like to share my feelings with my NDN family. This site has and will continue to be a blessing for me, especially now, to keep my mind off of things and learn from others experience. I am still working in the golf shop and have my job secured when I have recovered enough to go back to work. Until then, I'll just keep happy thoughts in my head. Cheers and I'll c-ya at the tables!!!!

[freeringo]

Looks like I have Marissa until Jan 13th now. The system takes toooo long. She is a "state child" at this time, so I can't even get a babysitter unless they are approved by DCF with background checks. She can't stay with anybody who has a felony. That limits alot of people and the rest of them don't want to go thru the hassel of DCF's investigation. I love Marissa, but this whole thing is a pain in the a s s. I'm having a good day today and I hope you all do too.

Today is a most beautiful day indeed and hearing your are feeling better makes my day even more enjoyable.

[taylovesthebeatles]

Thank you for the update Renee, it is always appreciated. I hope you're feeling stronger every single day! Much love to you, and I hope you get the situation with Marissa sorted out really soon.

I have a special gift for you (and anyone else on the forum) today:

Carbon_Leaf_Pink - Download

It is a link to a website that will let you get a free download of the Carbon Leaf song, "Pink" that I posted for you earlier in this thread, for Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I hope it lifts your spirits!

[Pokerkitty6]

uuuuuggggggg, what a depressing day for me. Just came back from the dr and she extended my chemo for three more months. I hate it! I can't stand it! I'm sooooo tired of cancer! Thanks for letting me vent....

[BnLM5]

Damn it PK! I am sorry! Three more months is not good news at all I agree. If you don't mind, what did she say about the extension? I am curious about her reason? I know that cancer sucks and so does chemo but it is obviously working. If it were not making any progress she would have stopped the chemo. So as stupid as it may sound this might be a good thing. If you can see the positive side of this you will feel better. I realize it is not an easy thing to do. But try! You know that I am going to remind you that your attitude is very important here! Surly you can feel the difference in the way you feel when your attitude is good than when it is not so good? I have said another prayer for you just moments ago and I will continue to do so. Nonetheless I have not stopped. I think about you every single day! That is the honest to God truth! I hold you close in my heart PK!

I sure do wish there was something that I could do to make this go away, or just to make you feel at your best at this moment. I am sorry that I can't do that. :( But I shall keep you filled with the positive things as it is easier for me to see them than for you to see them. And I do! : ) Lots of love PK and prayer lifted for you! Smile! Okay now smile one more time for me.... A little bigger... there you go, that is better. Now you can cry if you want to and release some of the tension. But if you decide not to rest assured that I will for you. Hang in there hon! Every little thing is going to be alright.

I wanted to tell you that I enjoyed our games yesterday! Thank you, I was tickled to see you there! It made my day!

[Pokerkitty6]

Awwwww B, you're such a sweetheart. I have triple negetative basal breast cancer and carry the genes for bc and ovaian cancer. I believe this means, I have triple the cancer cells which are negative for now, so she has to treat my cancer aggressively. She has told me many times and I have aggressive cancer, so she treats it the same way. I had a rough day yesterday, but today is a new day, a great day, and yes you did make me smile.

As far as seeing you at inetbet, the games were fun. I'll have a hard time remembering your other name. inetbet is the only casino I play slots and bj at. They are very easy to work with, so far no problems. Thanks again for everything.

[freeringo]

My cousin sends me this picture and I asked where is this house.
I lived there. lol
Then she goes on to remind me that I wrecked my bike there and broke my arm and got my toe ripped off.
We certainly need each other to remind us of all the fun we had growing up.

[taylovesthebeatles]

Love you Kitty. Stay strong for us, we'll hold you up. Praying for you always!

[BnLM5]

Damn it PK! I am sorry! Three more months is not good news at all I agree. If you don't mind, what did she say about the extension? I am curious about her reason? I know that cancer sucks and so does chemo but it is obviously working. If it were not making any progress she would have stopped the chemo. So as stupid as it may sound this might be a good thing. If you can see the positive side of this you will feel better. I realize it is not an easy thing to do. But try! You know that I am going to remind you that your attitude is very important here! Surly you can feel the difference in the way you feel when your attitude is good than when it is not so good? I have said another prayer for you just moments ago and I will continue to do so. Nonetheless I have not stopped. I think about you every single day! That is the honest to God truth! I hold you close in my heart PK!

I sure do wish there was something that I could do to make this go away, or just to make you feel at your best at this moment. I am sorry that I can't do that. :( But I shall keep you filled with the positive things as it is easier for me to see them than for you to see them. And I do! : ) Lots of love PK and prayer lifted for you! Smile! Okay now smile one more time for me.... A little bigger... there you go, that is better. Now you can cry if you want to and release some of the tension. But if you decide not to rest assured that I will for you. Hang in there hon! Every little thing is going to be alright.

I wanted to tell you that I enjoyed our games yesterday! Thank you, I was tickled to see you there! It made my day!

Your welcome PK. But I thought we were at Club World? I am happy that you had a great day! Have a happy day today as well!

[Pokerkitty6]

I just back from chemo and the reason it was extended was because I have aggressive cancer. I go for and hour and half once a week for 3 months. She hasn't decided about radiation yet and when this is all over pet scans once or twice a year. I have a 50-50 chance of cancer coming back in an area other than the ovary....I think inetbet and club world are the same. I was at inetbet. I can't play the bj tourneys at both casinos because they are related...says I can only play at one. I tried one night with my desk top and laptop...Thanks again everybody! You give me inspiration. I am a very positive person and I do see the glass half full!!! Luv Ya All!!!!

[Pokerkitty6]

Hi all! Had chemo today and thank God, it's not making me sick anymore. The chemo drug is called Taxotere and I take it for one and half hours. 9 more weeks to go....

[BnLM5]

That is so good to hear PK! I am so glad that you are not sick!!!! And nine weeks doesn't sound so bad. Well at least it sounds better than months. : )
You are still in my prayers and in my thoughts every day. Much love to you PK, from me! I am counting down the weeks with you. Hang in there baby!

How are things with Marissa? And How is Tony holding up? Give them a hello from me if you like. Lori

[Pokerkitty6]

Marissa and Tony are good, except Marissa got an F on her report card in math. How do you parents punish an F these days?

[BnLM5]

Marissa and Tony are good, except Marissa got an F on her report card in math. How do you parents punish an F these days?

Oh Boy! I can't believe that Marissa does not have more respect for herself then that.

With this kind of situation the first question is to get to the bottom of the problem. Is it a difficulty in learning math or is the difficulty in doing what needs to be done, such as homework etc.? Then go from there. Marissa obviously has issues in many areas but at this point her biggest problem it sounds like is her attitude. Has she any idea just how important her "EDUCATION" is? Or is she dead set on being a "LOSER" ? It is a shame to see a young girl with such wonderful opportunity and great potential just throw it away feeling sorry for herself and causing problems.

I wonder if Marissa realizes just how quickly childhood passes us by. By the time she does, she will be looking back wishing she could do it all again having you and social workers loving and pleading with her to be a good girl. Having things handed to her. How quickly reality comes upon us as adults. Having to pay the consequences for our actions. And how dearly they cost. When the day comes and it slaps her in the face that she is a big girl and there is nobody to pick her up and take her home.

No education these days = living on the streets hungry or if your lucky maybe she can find a friend, then maybe at night she can sleep in their car. Maybe. I mean really if she can't pass math in this grade, she will never pass math in high school and college will be out of the question.

Would it not be more productive for Marissa to put her energy and anger into herself really. Acting like a brat is hurting nobody but herself. But if she focused all this energy on proving to the world that she is of worth and filling her time with accomplishments rather than idiocy it would be in HER best interest. The only thing she is doing is cutting off her nose to spite her face. Now what kind of sense can she make of that.

PK Here is a big sigh ............. for you! I gotta hand it to you for being one tough cookie. Because I would want to be knocking some sense into her by now. And we both know, that can't happen. Patients on your part is all you can do and consistency!!! She is either going to make or break herself, is what it all will boil down to.

I have you all in my prayers!!!! Lots of Love to you and your family. : )

[Lilred36]

I'm glad to hear your doing well KITTY! 9 weeks is nothing,hang in there sweetie,sounds like you got it going your way now.Kids will be kids,when I was in school I would rather drink castor oil than do my English homework.I really hope ur ok and will keep ya in my thoughts.

[Pokerkitty6]

ok...6 more chemos to go! My dr. still hasn't made up her mind on radiation or not. Hopefully not! I already told you my hair is starting to grow back. My husband's new nick name for me (our friend Marty) started it.....Chia Pet. Ya gotta admit it's pretty funny. I'm not wearing anything on my head these days, just watching other people look at lucious locks!!! "God is Great, Beer is Good and people ARE crazy!"

[nodepositneeded]

ok...6 more chemos to go! My dr. still hasn't made up her mind on radiation or not. Hopefully not! I already told you my hair is starting to grow back. My husband's new nick name for me (our friend Marty) started it.....Chia Pet. Ya gotta admit it's pretty funny. I'm not wearing anything on my head these days, just watching other people look at lucious locks!!! "God is Great, Beer is Good and people ARE crazy!"

I'm just amazed at how someone can literally "glow" in a post online!

[GloBug]

yeah i must agree with ndn on this. you are glowing. took my shine away from me. lol i love to hear things from strong people like u . makes me think the world is good. keep striving CHIA PET it will all be done soon.

[Lilred36]

Glad your doing well Chia Pet,hope you don't need the radiation and the chemo knocks this out,best wishes girl.

[freeringo]

everybody crazy you crazy too

keep laughing girlfriend.

much love

[BnLM5]

ok...6 more chemos to go! My dr. still hasn't made up her mind on radiation or not. Hopefully not! I already told you my hair is starting to grow back. My husband's new nick name for me (our friend Marty) started it.....Chia Pet. Ya gotta admit it's pretty funny. I'm not wearing anything on my head these days, just watching other people look at lucious locks!!! "God is Great, Beer is Good and people ARE crazy!"

All I can say to you PK is WOW! You are amazing!!!

[Pokerkitty6]

Hi All!! It's been a while. TODAY WAS MY LAST DAY OF CHEMO!!!! 6 1/2 months worth, wow. Now all I have to do is have a colinostopy, my ovary removed, my "real implants" put in 2 or 3 pet scans a year and I'm good. I have a 50-50 chance of cancer coming back, so I hope like hell my glass is half full!!! NO MORE CHEMO!!!! I can't say it enough. I also went to court today for Marissa's dependency hearing and it looks like we talked the judge into another few months with us. We are hoping she can go back to her father soon. We love her but she needs to be with her Dad.

[GloBug]

thats great news PK. happy to hear that its come to a end. the glass is half full. just keep up with what is needed of u and all will be goood. and yes she does need her daddy.

[Lilred36]

Thats great news KITTY, a little good news is great.I hope it stays gone and never ever returns.I agree with Glo, if all is well there she does need her Dad.Glad your ok and welcome back.

[woohoosue]

wooohoooo! GF ..... I'm so happy for ya... I know it's hard for you to feel confident about your recovery but it will come ...may take a year or two but it will come. Great News about getting this part of the treatment behind u though!

[Pokerkitty6]

Somebody's gonna have to wipe this smile off my face! I just heard the doorbell ring at 6:15pm and it was UPS. My father-in-law, Barney from Duluth, MN, just sent me a bottle of Dom Perignon to have an "after chemo party"!!!! He must really love me! Wow! Should I save it for Valentine's Day? He thought I should open it tomorrow! I'm thinking a special day, but then again, no more chemo makes alot of special days!!!! I still can't believe!