I work at a bar and grill in Columbia Missouri. Bla Bla Bla Go MU Tigers whatever, at the same time thank god because Missouri as the state (place) sucks. Not the school you tear people up in sports. Anways, am I working everyday and going to school to live in a house and have a dog and kids if possible? Is that what I want? Is that what we should want as a human race or is there more does god or ala or Jehova or the devil expect that from us. Or should I sail around the world and see what the romans saw the beauty in experiance of not knowing what shall happen? Sometimes I feel like that is heaven. No bordem, no routine, no set plans. I hope to god that all of this hard work isnt to live and a house that I die in and try to act like everything is ok with my friken BMW that im so worried about sitting in the rain, hell sitting in the sun. When all along I should be happy that it has rained and now the sun is hear to dry it up. So what can I do if I leave and never return to the MIz Zou can I leave this lap top behind with its I music and its you **** and its poker? Can I leave my electic shaver, electric toothbrush, electric freken shower cleaner because im so lazy I make myself believe a squirt gun is doing it for me? What about my family how selfish is it to leave them? How selfish is it for them to exect me to live like they have? I guess they are a happy I know they are happy with me and my mother is the sweetest person Ill ever set eyes on I swear. But still the travel bug is in me telling me to run not to Florida or California or Hawaii but a place with no name on a boat or a train perhaps. Would I be so bad to want this and persue it is this a waste of life in gods eyes. Does the powerfull one need me to enjoy my want of bill worrys. I feel I could die off from a ship wreak or a plane crash poison of thy self and be fine with that. I dont think I want to build something my whole life just to say good bye. I already have this Earth and everything the powerfull one has put on it to enjoy and ill be damnd if I let it go to waste because the media tells me too. What about people that get things handed to them right in their lap. Im freken Paris Hilton what a wonder life she must have possesions possesions nothing in search of because she has it all. I think she doesnt even know what she is missing. What im missing is probaly right in front of her face, something that you know she doesnt notice. Ill bet a person like that gets more joy riding in a car I live in than a ferrari. Well for these people that have it all I hope your happy because Im trying to be just having the chance to know what it is like to do with out and want more in life not just your possessions and crap that can be distroyed just as fast as your caring of it.