Rejected Greeting Cards

You totaled your car
And can't remember why.
Could it have been.
That whole case of Bud Dry?

Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your Birthday
So we're having you put to sleep.

You are such a good friend
That if we were on a sinking ship
And there was only one life jacket....
I'd miss you heaps and think of you often.

When we were together,
You always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.

Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go,
Would you like to take this knife out of my back.
You'll probably need it again.

Happy Birthday! You look great for your age...
Almost Lifelike!

Wrong section.... grr wont let me move it.

Ok smartass where should i put it. Their is not a joke section.

Umm, what?

you posted this in the general poker section.... it got moved.

And we shud have a joke section

dang what is this about? not funny but bad even for me

lol these are great to wake up to. Keep posting them : )